This is my third pregnancy. In three years. I almost don’t remember what it feels like not to be pregnant. Many aspects of pregnancy just seem like the everyday norm to me. I expect to have round ligament pain (ouch!), I expect that rolling out of bed in the morning is now an impossible task, even the wonderful kicks to my lungs and ribs are routine.
That being said, I was not the emotional freak that I have become the last two times. I got complements on how even I was while pregnant. My husband bragged about my lack of crying and how lucky he was to have a non-hormonal insane women the last two pregnancies.
This time he is not so lucky. He asks me on a daily basis if I am okay, feeling okay, if I am happy etc. All the time, enough that it actually drives me insane. Like, a lot. Should it? No. I assume, um…. I know that I have been more emotional this time around. I am up and down like my son is on the couch (and chairs… and me… and my husband). Constantly. I cry, or want to cry all the time. I don’t need a reason.
Here are just a few things that have made me cry:
1. My daughter smiled at me.
2. My son smiled at me.
3. My son made out with me (like grabbed my face, shoved it into his and gave me full on tongue action… it was kind of gross).
4. The new episode of Hells Kitchen made me cry (not sure why).
5. A dog barked at me.
6. There have been numerous twitter updates by people I have never met but love as if I have that I have cried at (most of them were happy reasons).
7. I cried just because some of these people are really, truly amazing people.
9. Dinner didn’t taste good.
10. My bath was too hot.
11. I am crying right now because I really want some brownies, or chocolate chip cookies, or some corn dip (okay not really crying over that, but um… mmmmmmm foooood).
So yeah… I have been crying a lot.
Raging hormones, not so fun.
But at the same time I am happier than I have been in a long time. Sure I feel like crap all the time, and most of the time I would rather be in bed, sleeping, snuggling with my body pillow than talking to my husband or kids, but I AM happy. I just don’t look happy. Maybe I should work on that…