I have been thinking about a lot lately. Life has just seems to chaotic and uncontrollable that I find myself always wondering about what we are doing wrong, and wondering how can we move forward so that we are all happy. This usually brings me to thoughts about my business. Do I really love working as a photographer?
The answer to this is yes…. and no. I love photography, and I love taking pictures of the newborns and children that come into my home studio. But I hate the business side of it. I hate trying to find that reasonable balance of prices. I hate charging people an arm and a leg and whatever else they have to give for pictures. I believe that everyone deserves great pictures of themselves, their kids and their families. However, when photography becomes you income source for your own family, you need to make some sort of profit. Being a newborn and children’s photographer isn’t cheap and time consuming. So, I struggle at staying competitive and staying true to my values.
But there is a whole other issue.. Those who knew me in high school would have considered me more of the geeky sort. I took most of the sciences and I generally got good grades. I was on the career path of something in the sciences. The creative side was always there. I have always loved art, web design (does anyone remember artfire?) and photography, but growing up it was never a career choice for me. When I moved to Denmark, I took a bachelors degree in European Studies (it was a mix of business and law). I wanted to take a masters in European Law. Then life got complicated, and I ended up else where, and here I am 4 years later as a photographer.
But I miss that intellectual side (I’m not saying photographers are not intellectual, it just falls more on the creative side). I miss studying. I kind of wish I had a job in a company or a law firm. I miss co-workers. Over the last couple of days I found out that it may be possible for me to take a Masters in International Law. I am beyond thrilled at the idea, however it is expensive. However the program would be perfect because it is done online (through a very good university), which means I can do this while I am at home with the new baby. But as I said, it is expensive. However, here in Denmark , university education is free if you live here. However, again, the university isn’t located in Denmark. BUT… you can apply for the government to pay for part of the program and receive a special student loan to cover the rest. They need to first approve the program, which is where I am sitting at for the moment. If they will give me the money for it, I will go for it. So for the moment I am sitting here hoping to hear back from them soon….
(I’m going to skip the wearing and the eating since my post is already super long!)