The past couple of months have been a frustrating couple of months for me. You may have noticed (or maybe you didn’t) that I haven’t posted a thing. I have thought about this blog almost everyday, however I just could not find the time for it.
My health has really been slowing me down. You may have read in my blog before, that since Sophie was born I have been suffereing with a prolaspe. At my 5 week post partum appointment I was told that I had a bit of a bladder prolapse, and that I should wait 6 months to see if it improved on its own. Last month, I had enough. I have constant pain in my lower back and pelvic. On days where I have had to do a lot with the kids, I can feel something ‘falling out’. It is uncomforable, and to add too it I seem to also have some incontenice. Yay! Not…. So I made an appointment with my new doctor, and he refered me to the specalist in the hosptial right away. I go tomorrow, and I am hoping for some sort of solution.
My fybromyalgia has really flared up. So I have the pain from the prolaspe, plus pain everywhere else. I am utterly exahusted. It doesn’t matter how much rest I get, I am so tired throughout the day. Brain fog has also set in, which makes it difficult to get things done. I have all these intentions to do things with the kids after dinner, but once the evening hits.. I am a zombie with the single goal of getting the kids to bed so I can either go to bed, or watch some tv and fall asleep. I think I need to go to the doctor for this, but honestly options are great. It is either sleeping pills at night so that I get a proper sleep and not being able to help with the kids at night, or pain drugs that make me fried during the day. So yeah.. there is that.
These things have basically made things just impossible to get done. Owning a business is hard, and most times I feel like I am drowning through it some days. On one hand, business seems to be picking up, which is good, because we need the money. On the other hand.. some times it is so overwhelming and time consuming that it becomes hard on me and my family. And then comes the frustration.. the frustration of not having time to do things for myself. Like my project 360, like blogging, like drawing, like reading.. and the billion other things I love to do.
I have made steps to make things easier. I have resolved to hire someone for a few hours each week to help me with business stuff. I have resolved that come 4pm, I try not to answer any work related messages. Weekends I don’t work unless I have a scheduled photography day, which is two times a month. These things help. I need the break from work. I need the time to find myself again and have a separate like other than work.
So that is a small peak into my life the last couple of months.. I hope to make it back to this space again soon. I miss blogging.
Until then.. today was my son’s birthday, so here is a picture of him 🙂